Someday Not Soon
by misqueue
Summary: Blaine proposes with a speech, and Kurt is not surprised. A delayed 4x22 "All or Nothing" response.


There, in Blaine's steady hand, it glitters like a star against the black velvet. The wide band is simple silver metal—satin finish, not glossy. Just the one discreet diamond set into it, refracting all the colors of the rainbow. It's beautiful and hard to look away from, but Kurt does.

"What's this?" he asks Blaine, even though he knows. He can't not know. It's not even a surprise. It should be strange that it's not a surprise, but it's not even that.

From where he kneels, Blaine's smile is gorgeous. There's some show in it. Kurt recognizes that easily enough, but it's the sort backed by honest emotion, and there's plenty of that too: the earnestness that still makes Kurt's heart ache after all this time, the love that simply won't fade from Blaine's too bright eyes, the fear and hope—and the resignation to both that is braided together into courage.

Blaine may as well be holding his heart out for Kurt.

"Kurt Elizabeth Hummel," Blaine begins. He takes Kurt's hand.

Kurt closes his eyes. He knows Blaine; this will be a speech.

"We used to talk about marrying each other. You once told me your answer was yes, even though I hadn't even asked you the question yet. We planned a future together. Together, we dreamed a whole life." Blaine takes a deep breath. "And then you went to New York."

Kurt opens his eyes, tightens his fingers around Blaine's.

"When you left, I thought it was going to be okay. But instead, it felt like I'd just been woken up, and now the amazing dream was over. I was suddenly awake in this world that didn't hold as much love or hope or joy. The longer you were gone, the more those things faded, and I started to believe I could never get them back. And then, in my despair, I hurt you. It was too late when I realized I'd been so wrong." Blaine falls silent, his eyes are glistening now, shining brighter than the diamond.

"Blaine..." Kurt doesn't want another apology.

"I know I can't undo my mistakes," Blaine says, and his voice remains steady. "And I know we can't fall asleep again and return to that wonderful dream we shared, but what I do know, more and more every day, is that I want to make a new one with you." Blaine's smile fades into seriousness and sincerity. "So, I'm asking you if you will come dream with me again. If someday, not soon, Kurt, will you marry me?"

Kurt's lips are numb; it's hard to even swallow. All he can do is stare.

Blaine rubs between Kurt's knuckles with his thumb. "I know we're not together now. I know this isn't easy. I can't promise you easy. I can't even promise to never make another mistake. But I can promise you this: I want to share this life with you. However it comes, I want it to be with you." Blaine's smile flickers back to life, tender and real. "We may be unsure of where we are now, but I believe we're both sure of the destination. Can we travel together again?"

Suddenly something _hurts_. It's tight in Kurt's chest, strangling the base of his throat. Agony squeezes the breath from Kurt's lungs, and his knees tremble. His vision swims, and Kurt starts to cry. Blaine tugs his hand, and Kurt hears the ring box clap shut. He can't speak, can barely see. He gives in to the downward drag of gravity, the impulse of Blaine's grip, and lets his knees buckle. He comes down into Blaine's arms, and Blaine pulls him into an awkward embrace, right there on the floor in the choir room.

"Sweetheart," Blaine says, bewildered. "It's okay," he says. "You don't have to... What can I—? Should I leave? Do you need to be alone?"

A sob against Blaine's shoulder, an emphatic shake of his head, and Kurt finds his breath. "No, no, no," he mumbles, and then he finds the words. "Hold me, Blaine, please."

"Okay," Blaine says, and he holds Kurt while he cries. "I'm here," he says.

The tension unwinds slowly. Breath by breath, Kurt's exhales the pain. Until it's gone and he feels so strangely empty, it's like he's turned transparent inside. When the tears stop, "Take me home," Kurt says.

"All right," Blaine answers.

.:.:.

In Kurt's old bedroom, they don't bother with a light. The curtains are drawn back, and moonlight dusts the surfaces silver.

Kurt sits on the bed and leans back on an elbow; he reaches for Blaine with the other hand, palm up, inviting. "Make love to me," Kurt says.

Blaine sets the ring box on the night table and comes to the bed. He undresses Kurt, neither rushing nor taking his time. He kisses Kurt: his mouth, his jaw, his throat, chest, and belly; and then he takes Kurt's cock into his mouth, and rolls Kurt's balls in a gentle hand. And Kurt's spreading his legs, tangling his fingers into Blaine's hair and whispering, "Oh, honey, that feels so good," and then, "I want you to fuck me, please."

Blaine says nothing as he undresses and finds the lubricant in Kurt's nightstand drawer. There are no condoms, though. Kurt asks Blaine if they need one; Blaine says no.

There's no prep, just lube. And soon Kurt's lying on his back with his thighs clasped warm against Blaine's ribs, he's holding Blaine's cock steady in place, and Blaine is pressing hard against him where he will open. But his body resists for several long heartbeats; it's a wonderful ache. But then... and then, with a gasp that sends his eyes wide, Kurt feels his body give, and Blaine pushes inside him: profound stretch and delicious friction.

Slowly at first, to let Kurt's body accept him best, Blaine moves and breathes through kisses pressed to Kurt's throat.

Kurt holds him close, cradles the back of his head, smiles into his hair and whispers, "I love you."

And Blaine says, "I know."

.:.:.

Sometime after, Blaine has dozed off, his head tucked against Kurt's shoulder. Carefully, Kurt reaches for the ring box on the nightstand. He opens it and looks at the ring. Even in the dim light, it sparkles. He thinks about Blaine going to all the local jewelry shops, what he must have been feeling when he looked at the rings, how he felt when he saw this one and knew it was the right one. How it must have felt when he paid for it, when he held it in his hand, carried it in his pocket—just having it there, knowing what it was and what he intended to do. What it means for Blaine to be offering it to Kurt now, after everything.

After everything, Kurt takes the ring from its velvet nest and sets the box aside. He holds his breath as he turns it between his forefinger and thumb. A future together, a new dream. No impossible promise of happily ever after, but instead a humble promise to take the journey together. The answer is the same as it's always been, and the rings fits perfectly.

.


End file.
